Things I have learned since calving

Ya, I know. I have only been in possession of Surround Sound for almost six months, but I have learned some valuable lessons I should pass on:) teeheehee.

Granted, I lug two kids around, and you probably don't (and that sucks for you because to appease your urge to have more kids, you have to be pregnant again and endure the utter boredom that comes with it!) And, I am NOT going to tell you having a kid is the most amazing thing in the world, because they can be giant pain in the asses most of the time. Plus, I know how annoying advice can be because I got it twice as many times from annoying, peppy soccer mom wanna be's who just couldn't wait to start play groups and stuff. Make me want to vomit by the way, because I still have a full time job.... until I get let go or something.

One thing I have learned is nice people are still alive. Just yesterday, I was pushing SS and pulling my cart of groceries and two women offered to help me out by pushing the cart. I declined b/c it is a pain in the ass to get the kids in, load the stroller then put the groceries in, but it was great to have someone smile at me with entertainment in their eyes, not pity. I have even had a check out clerk at Target offer to find someone to help me out. They don't do that very often. It was sweet, but again my stubborn side won and out we went, alone, into the Oklahoma wind.

Coupons are a must because then you don't have to feel guilt for buying beer!!!! Or am I the only parent that finds guilt wash over them whenever they spend their hard earned money on themselves in the form of cheap shades, beer or a gossip magazine?!?!?! Raise your hand if you are like me. Now put them down and go buy yourself something. It doesn't make us bad people at all. So, I find coupons in all sorts of places, double them up and save money. The most I have saved is $39 in one trip. That is pretty good because I wasn't insane coupon crazy and buying 42 containers of cream cheese and 44 things of Gatorade.

Park by the cart return. You single baby mommas can get a cart and toss your child in there and STILL get groceries. Not that I am jealous or anything, but blah to you:) But, the other good thing is that you are close to it and can return the cart without some crazy person seeing a child in the car alone and calling DHS on you. Which, is a stupid rule any more. This chick can't go on a road trip because my bladder will betray me and force me to have a bathroom break. But nnnnnoooooo. That will turn into a 45 minute stop for all three of us. Ugh. Anywho. I digress.

One other little piece of parking lot advice- don't pull through the spot. I am normally that person because I suck so bad at the actual parking part of driving (and driving in general). So, I have found that it never fails that a mother pulls through a spot in the back of the parking lot, no one else is around and then bam... a giant truck with camo stickers all over it pulls right up behind them. Therefore there is no room to open the trunk to put your stroller back in, you cuss the OU fan who has never been on campus before for being such a complete and total idiot all the while your stroller full of kids starts to roll away. True story. Thanks for reading.

One more thing..... and then I will stop annoying you. I have learned that I got so damn lucky! My boring pregnancy yielded me two funny ass kids and one great dad in Chisolm. Just yesterday, Chuck decided everything I did was hilarious. I have awarded her the title of my BFF because who doesn't want a BFF that laughs at every joke?!?! That is what I pay her to do. And, I know that I don't want to not have a full-time job, I couldn't give it up, but I also figured out that it is easy to forget to look at my day planner. So, in an attempt to keep my job, I am going back to work.

Cheers!