Hump day makes me giggle. Makes me think of Brahman cattle that I always called humpies. Makes me sort of giggle like a kid thinking about the horizontal mamba. Now that you have joined me in the gutter, lets start this nonsensical piece of fodder.
As I just ranted to my pal Kate Miller my credit card bill was $10.41. The charges were for iTunes downloads and iTunes only. I should never have came across to the dark side, gotten sucked into an iPhone or figured out how amazingly simple it is to purchase songs like "Red, Red, Wine" "the Thong Song" and "Toot it and Boot it." Grab your phone and purchase them all now!
(click the link and be prepared to bust a gut at her manipulation of the English language!)
My daddy dog cracks me up. He called to chat with me about lunch, the amount of mud they have, how his cattle aren't broke yet and the show is in a month and also about how high the lottery is up to. That, my friends, was my second "If I had a Million dollars....." convo of the day, too. I am intellectually stimulating to all groups I encounter, aren't I? But then again, dad said I should wish in one hand and shit in the other to see which gets full faster! Always one to put things back in perspective.
My limp locks got a trim last week, making them silky smooth and a magnet for my twirling addiction. I am going to need carpel tunnel surgery and an intervention someday. It is childish, annoying and ooooooohhhhhh so soooooothing.
If the Royal wedding doesn't hurry up and get the hell off our airwaves, I might be forced to send them a letter detailing how much marriage really isn't the end all cure all to everything, that they don't stand a snowballs chance in hell of being King and Queen and fairytales are for losers. My advanced apologies if your TiVo is all ready set to record it and you are rushing to the door every half hour to see if Fedex has delivered your mail order "official" program of events, but get a life. Take a long look at yourself and put that money and energy into making something better on our soil. Help others with your free time, pretty please? And I digress.
My life is boring, my days are long and I have a ton of crap to get done at work. I believe I am an official grown up because that is okay with me. I am glad I found something that didn't make me feel like a zombie who had been ran through a wood chipper everyday (as in an employee of the Oklahoma Wheat Commission!) Now, if only the weather would straighten up and I could make me patio not look so damn naked, my days would be perfect.
Brother Colty is in Reno. I hope he doesn't lose his ass, knock up a hooker or get a disease. Simply because that would make Keffer holiday's akward. Not because it would prove I am the best and the favorite. I mean, I know I am but it is so hard to break it to him! heehee.
My work day is finally over. I am going to let y'all read this and head home. Thanks for checking in on me. Hope you aren't too emotionally stunted from my incoherant utterings!
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